Chicago Gang Violence Leads to Death

Unbelievably shocking footage of a two rival Chicago gangs warring in the streets caught on amateur footage.

I'm kind of speechless on this one. The report makes it sound like the rival gangs made a conscious decision not to use guns or knives. Are boards noble? Am I missing something?

Thoughts on the Halo Movie

This is the short video that Bungie Studios made along with then-director Neil Blomkamp. For Halo die-hards, this short film shows action from the plot-line hours before the start of events of Halo 3. Since I'm such a fan-boy to this particular project I can't honestly express I feel. By this I mean, I think this would be an incredible trailer as far as movie standards go. But in actuality, seeing spike grenades and rocket launches to spec of the Halo Universe is enough to leave me enthralled. Sadly, Blomkamp is no longer with the project. In fact, the whole project is dead. IMDB lists it as "in production," but that doesn't mean that people are actually doing things for the movie at all. Most recently Steven Spielberg has been rumored to be attached to the project, but with Microsoft releasing a statement that the project will be on hold until other Bungie projects are finished.

I saw District 9 a few weeks ago and couldn't help but think that the entire movie was made because the Halo movie fell through. The aliens were so similar to the Covenant Elite, and the live-action sequences in the movie were on par with the sequences in the video posted above. In all likelihood, this just means that Blomkamp has a distinct cinematic style which could follow him throughout his career. Like I said, I'm sad that the movie has a lot of obstacles to overcome, but after seeing District 9, although I liked it, I guess I can wait. Whoever decides to direct/produce Halo will be able to emulate what Blomkamp did right, and adjust things that he did wrong.

Plaxico Burress Will Likely Face "Man-to-Man" Coverage

Today, Deadspin outlined that Plaxico Burress' infamous self-inflicted gunshot wound was not accurately reported by the New York Post. A Dec. 1st article from the Post indicated that Burress attempted to conceal the weapon in his sweatpants. Recently, in an interview with Jeremy Schaap of ESPN, Burress stated that the sweatpants tale was false, and that he was wearing jeans on that fateful night. These "facts" do not make Jon Stewart any less funny. Because in all likelihood, Burress is simply trying to make a little bit less of an ass of himself as possible. I wish Plaxico the best of luck in prison. Reports are that he will spend more time alone due to his celebrity, in an attempt to "protect" the NFL star from unnecessary harassment from other inmates.

Prank your girlfriend/wife/mistress

Girlfriend Scared by Fake Head in Bed - Watch more Funny Videos

I have a girlfriend right now who lives at school. I live at home about an hour away and we see each other about once a week. She's an absolute sweetheart and I couldn't be luckier to have her. With that said, it's videos like this that make me wish we could fast forward 2 years until she graduates so we can have a place together. This is what true love is all about. Behavior like this appeals to me just as much as procreating does.

Weekend Observations

This past weekend I went to Medford to hang out with a few friends from college. Saturday night, we went to Hurricane O'Reilly's. Nightclubs are not my forte but I wasn't really throwing out any better ideas. For most of the night, I enjoyed a bevy of fun activities. Often times I was standing in close proximity to the group I came with. The music was far too loud to talk, and none of us are any good at dancing with girls, so there wasn't much action going on. This is undoubtedly my main concern when forced to "club." The whole atmosphere should be prefaced with a "Non-Ballers need not apply" style advisory. Going to semi-formal and homecoming dances were far more fun than this solely because there was a place to go and sit down when standing up sucked. But I was there, and I was stuck there.

At no age will I be bored with personal games; private competitions and adventures I put myself through simply hoping that some form of entertainment (for me) ensues. Saturday night's game was of the simpler variety. There was no intended goal. I just chose the thickest and most dense portion of the people on the dance floor, and walked in between everyone. I bumped into just about everyone, made eye contact with others, and had many of those awkward passing moments where two people need to go in opposite directions, but continue to motion to the same path, and then nearly bump into each other about 3 or 4 times in a row, until finally, the alpha human involved, definitively marks a course for either him/herself, or adamantly urges the other person to pass. This happened to me a lot in the halls of school. When this happens to me, I have a witty comment at my disposal to ease the tension of the moment. I am not going to share it with you, but I came up with it about 10 years ago, and will probably be using it 10 years from now. The club was too loud for this, but I wasn't out there to tell jokes. I like to picture myself as Catherine Zeta Jones in the movie Entrapment when Sean Connery's character trains her to maneuver, nimbly through the infrared wires that were guarding a priceless Chinese mask. Only in my case, once I maneuvered to the other side of the dance floor, there was less of an ancient artifact, and more of a sudden realization that I'm very drunk and all by myself.

So I parallel double parked that motherfucker sideways

I'm finally going to get serious about leaving more notes on people's cars. I did it the other day and coincidentally got to see the guy's reaction. He read the note and then circled his entire car, with a facial expression that said "Pleeeasse.... this is fiiiiiiiine." Then I thought... "What if that guy came out and was handicapped or something?" Yeah, right. If that's the case then I'm definitely going out and kicking his ass for parking like that.

Plus he has the spinner from his dayton's in his hand, keys in his hand, reason again, to let you know he's the man

For a long time I was upset I didn't get a chance to see the movie "Iron Man," starring Robert Downey Jr. Even when the movie was being hyped up last year, I was perplexed by the fact that Hollywood gave this guy a leading role since the ongoing punch line for years that Downey was a complete drug addict and not particularly talented to begin with. So the fact that Marvel chose him to be a protagonist their movie never sat right with me. But as Ari Gold once said, "Hollywood loves a comeback."

From the reports of friends, I was pretty sure the movie would be pretty good. The current standard for super hero movies is set pretty high and all the ones I've seen have found a way to be impressive in their own way. "Iron man" was painfully unimpressive. There were a lot of fallible qualities in this movie but the one I hated most was the writing. I realize that Tony Stark as a character was supposed to the colloquial "man," one who is simultaneously cooler, hotter, smarter and more casual than all of us could possibly strive to be. But I haven't seen a character's characteristics shoved so far down an audience's throat since..... ever. It's never this horrible. Lines like "If my calculations are correct, and they usually are.....," make this movie not only unenjoyable but painful.

I realize that super-hero movies should be flooded with implausible scenarios, but there is a certain subtlety to character development that escapes this movie. Somewhere along the line, an audience member wants to feel that they've "discovered" something about the character that wasn't laid directly in front of them. Tony Stark and his epic "coolness" was shoved down my throat a day and half ago and I've been coughing him up and spitting him out the front door ever since.